|Greeting, Pilgrim. Your search has ended. You have abandoned all hope and entered the new Asubry Jukes web sight…cite…site. Shite. Whatever they call these things. Let ole Uncle Southside be the first to warn --- warmly welcome you. A wondrous world of wacky delights awaits you, wanderer. There’ll be music and laughter and pretty colours and stupid jokes and hazmat alerts and, oh I don’t know; maybe even a kernel of real info that you can actually use. Doubtful, but one never knows, do one?
A small request: if you are reading this in your jammies or dressing robe, please ask whomever does your laundry not to use fabric softener. Effie, the genius-type who designed and runs this website is allergic. Thank you. The Management.
As many of you are no doubt aware, we are playing many newish areas this year. We gotall the way to Montana! Why? Who knows. Ask Tim Drake, aka Simon Lagree, our bookie. It is my fervent hope that we will be in your god-forsaken corner of the world in the future. Please to be checking the calendar regularly and don’t bother asking me cause, like, I know nothing’. I just pray they have electricity there..
| THE JIVES
April, 13 2013
January, 28 2013
October, 29 2012
Exciting News! Well, to me anyway. The live CD of our evisceration of Men Without Women, the great Little Steven LP will be on offer soon, very soon…any day now…and it sounds fabboo. 6 horns, three screaming banshees, percussion (mostly from my hungover brain) and a smokin’ rhythm section plus 10 great Steve Van Zandt tunes. And, if you act now, I’ll include 3 bonus tracks that Steve and I sing what we laughingly call harmony on. Don’t miss it if you can! Fwi, it costs extra not to get the bonus tracks. So shut up and eat your gruel.
For those of you who endured a Poor Fools show or two, watch out. We are working on a CD but that bum Jon Bon Jovi stole OUR engineer, Mike Rew, so you’ve been given a short reprieve. But we’ll find you and force you to listen to it someday. Fair warning. I hear Bahrain is nice this time of year.
As for a new Jukes record, I have written many songs for it. Now if Kazee would get off his dead ass and finish his part, maybe we could finally figure out what the hell we’re doing. I hope to get that pile of offal out next year. Oh, that’s right. There ain’t gonna be no next year. Hallalulia! You’re saved. Now peoples, I am going to try to be more diligent with my Jives. They may take many forms. One month it may be just news, another time it mayhap will be a song I think you should know, and at times I will have a three hour slide show of my vacation pics. What fun! And I’ll try and think up some more contests for youse maniacs. You do so well at them. Plus I got a whole lotta old Converse that I need to get rid of as prizes. I have to; the mice are starting to complain about the stench.
So there you have it. As gruesome a set of paragraphs as you’re ever likely to come across. Please inform Carol Gerber of any grammar or spelling errors, and Carol; keep it to yourself, ya nudge.
Over and out.