Johnny's Jive



Ah yes, tis the season to be jolly....AGAIN! I'm with Hood. He thinks Christmas should happen every 5 years. But I realize that some of you Jukians are medicated enough to still enjoy the holidays. Poor... I mean lucky devils. All's I know is it's getting cold and I gotta work. Phooooey. I hadta take a part-time job at the car wash to pay for the many, many Xmas gifts I'm giving this year. Didja ever slop water on a SUV in 38 degree weather? Let me tell ya, it ain't no walk thru the vineyards in southern France. The things I do for peoples. Saint Southside; that's me.

On the music front, we are still working on the new Jukes CD. I hope to have it out for Spring, but then I said last Summer that it would be out by Autumn. But I promise that it will be released. Promise. Really. Oh, shut up. Also, New Years Eve is fast approaching. We will be doing some of the new material on that night, and I hope you like it. If not just fake that you do. I'm fragile. Ask any Juke. Hmmmm. Better not.

We lived thru another tour of merry, dirty, rainy old England. One of the highlights was staying in a 500 year old hotel in Nottingham. Joey Stann saw a ghost and we all ate big hunks of meat and drank the nut-brown ale. At least I think we did. I can't remember exactly. More ale please, miss. We stayed for two nights in Lincoln, a small town with a big cathedral. I was looking forward to viewing said edifice, but Swinnie booked us into a cheap hotel a few miles from the town centre. (that's how they spell "center" over there. The goofballs.) I took a cab into town for about $40.00 and was climbing up the hill to the damn thing when it started pissing down rain. All the shops were closed and I was the only idiot on the street, so I said the Hell with it and took another $40.00 cab back to the cheap hotel. Not happy, I was. But we did get to see the winking bridge in Newcastle, what Deb and Dave Druid said we hadta see. Thrilling. Next.

There will always be an England. Although Scotland, Ireland and Wales would rather there wouldn't.

As you all know, Mr. Bobby Bandilierra is working with Miss Jon Bon Jovi for a while. Just until he drives Jon crazy and they throw him off the Lear jet. This New Years we will have the services of both Glenn the General Alexander and Billy the Kid Walton, so expect some git-tar pyrotechnics. They both did yeoman’s work in Eu/England. Thanks, guys.

And thanks to all the fans who turned out in such fabled British towns as Frome, Lincoln, Holmefirth, Leemington Spa (?) and the one I think was called Brisbytonvillebergshire. And thank you to the Euro fans.

And thanks to the stalwart Juke that didn’t complain even once. I know there must be one.

Happy Holidays!


Oh Shut Up! I know I haven't jived in a year, but...I been sick. And busy. And lazy.

How about this.

Every time I write something, I hit spell check and there are so many misteaks that the computer just erases the whole damn thing. You believe me, don'cha? Sure, you do.

It has been an eventful time since last I writ. LaBamba and The Love Man have departed for the Land of Dreams and Nightmares. As Van Dyke Parks said, "Dreams are stillborn in Hollywood". Nice. We wish them both terrible luck out there so's they will return to the swamps of Jersey where they belong. Not really. California needs more fruits and nuts out there. They should fit right in.

The financial debacle has, I'm sure, hit many of you. I hope not too hard. We Jukes have struggled a little, but with summer here, things are looking up. I hope to keep ticket prices as low as possible, and we are going to be putting up songs and shows for download at a reasonable price. Also, I am going to TRY to twist the King Pin's arm into giving discounts for merch, but he's such a bully. The brute. Yell at him when you see him. He needs it.

On the "product" front, we are in the throes of recording a new CD. Most of the songs will be home-grown, and they are very rockandroll oriented. Not too much R&B this time, because that's just the way I'm rollin' Mitch. I hope to have the opus completed by late summer, but tempus sure do fugit when you are recording.

As forewarned, we will be striking England again this Autumn. It will be as prophesied in Nostradamus; a plague of locusts and trombones. Flee for the heights, ye mortals! We WILL be playing tunes from the new CD by then....hear me, Jukes? We will, of course, haunt the old places like Martells and The Pony and the Hampton Beach Casino, etc, etc, etc. You’ll need refreshment by then, so stop on by.

On the home front, I have planted many herbs and a few Melvins, and am going to try tomatoes. Again. I’m never here to water the little bastards, so they up and die on me in spite. And I swear this year I will get one (1) lemon from my Myers lemon tree, if the squirrels don’t snatch it first. Exciting, isn’t it? You won’t get this hot gossip from Little Steven's web site.

In closing, let me state that I will endeavor to be more diligent in writing, but probably not.

Yours in perpetuity

Curate ut valeatis

Uncle South

The Jives